Chronicles of A Down Low Brotha

Caught Between Two Worlds

Friday, September 17, 2010

Idle Worship

The weekends for me are always so busy with running errands and then the usual church service.  I am always amazed at how many people have stories of being picked up, hit on, or flirted with at the gym, grocery store, the mall...you know public places.  Part  of my amazement stems from the fact that I always say, "Nothing like that ever happens to me."  I was sharing this sentiment with a friend "Lester" who recently moved to Detroit 3 weeks ago, and he said he has been hit on by at least 4 different men, and amazing to me in public places. 

I questioned him and said, "How do you do it? Because nothing like that ever happens to me."  He in turn said, "For starters, its the way you carry yourself."  I said, "What does that mean?"  He says to me, well you carry yourself as if you're not looking for anything and you're not interested, and you don't pay attention to your surroundings.  Secondly, it's in the eyes!  if a guy gives you a gaze, that's how you know there is interest there because the eyes always tell.  After all the eyes are the window to the soul.

I said points well taken... So on Sunday, I went to church, actually I visited another church far from the church my family and I attend on a regular basis.  I noticed will standing in the church vestibule waiting to enter the sanctuary, that a young man, was staring at me, well dressed, not oh so attractive and not really my type, appeard masculine but staring nonetheless.  During the service, they asked for all the first time visitors to stand, because they wanted to invite usto a special visitors suite, following service as a thank you for visiting and to offer a complimentary coy of the sermon, and to partake of some light refreshments.

Following service I went to the first time guest suite, and there he was a young man, decent, not attractive but there he was an Elder in the church and there to welcome all visitors.  He could not properly greet the guests ahead of me for looking at me! lol  As i grabbed a bottle of water he reached out his hand to take my visitors card and gave me a long firm handshake, as he introduced myself.  The conversation was casual and professional yet it was in the eyes....  he looked deeply into my eyes.

Later that evening i received a call from a number I didn't recognize, so as I answered I immediately recognized the voice as the voice from the person I had talked to earlier in the day at church.  First he started out in saying, he was calling to thank me for visiting the church on behalf of the pastor and first lady...but then the conversation just got weird.  It actually sounded as if he was stroking his dick, while talking to me, because he kept making weird breathing sounds.  I asked his was everything okay and he said, "yes, i just got distracted."  He then later said do you text and I said man i don't even know you like that.  He said well cool, later man!

A few hours later I received a text from the same number telling me that he really liked me and wanted to see what was up with me, he felt a vibe that made him horny..  he goes on to say that he could not even focus on worship....Idle worship....lol 

I don't know what gives guys the feeling that they can just come into someone's personal space without being invited.  Lol but I realize maybe that's the reason why people have become so impersonal.  It's difficult enough to deal with the stress and trauma of being on the downlow, but then you add church queens and it makes it way overrated.

What are your thoughts?

4 comments:

  1. Okay, so first, you've completely drawn me in because I feel the same way! Who are these people who get hit on everywhere: grocery stores, malls, Taco Bell on Wednesday morning at 11AM, wearing sweat pants, old sneakers and a ball cap (lol) I don't get the idea that "not looking for anything" prevents someone from recognizing and approaching a good thing. Who wants to go around eyeballing every guy or girl that moves trying to figure out if they're looking at you, interesting in you, etc? That seems time consuming.
    I too wonder about people who just come on too strong. Showing interest doesn't exactly constitute late night phone sex four hours after we meet but whatever. Different strokes for different folks. Literally.

    I'm sure there is some merit to being aware of your surroundings. I guess learning to balance awareness and individual focus is a learned skill. Great topic!

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  2. Being that I'm still a little green to this lifestyle I asked my ex (while we were dating) that exact same question you asked Lester and my ex responded the EXACT same way. Now that I'm becoming more aware of my surroundings I've come to realize there is a lot of truth to what Lester and my ex have said. Looking back I can reflect on the missed opportunities because I was scared or unsure if that hot looking dude is "down" and interested in me as well. I'm still learning but I have made some progress.

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  3. Okay, (1) WHERE THE FVCK is THIS church? lol. (2) Don't go there again. (3). make sure you tell ME, so "I" can go.

    And umm, why haven't I heard from you?

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  4. @Bobtastick Thanks for reading!!! you're definitely right about your observation!!
    @ Josh i am a bit green as well, that's why blogging is helping me to identify what i'm feeling and experiencing.. Thanks for reading!!
    @Billingsly Where have u been is my question!! Please hit me up..we have alot to catch up on!!

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