Chronicles of A Down Low Brotha

Caught Between Two Worlds

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Dawning of a New Era

Welcome to my world…..the Chronicles of a Down Low Brother. Yeah I know you’re probably wondering why I chose to live this lifestyle. Truth is at times I feel like this lifestyle chose me. Being constantly caught between the covert and clandestine world of what we know as the down low and the morally upright life of a respectable law-abiding married contributor to society. It is torrid affair between an underground reality of burning desire and fictitious yet noble performance. Caught between two worlds, yes that’s what I am, and now I’m at the place of trying to discover when where and how this charade will end, or will it ever?

My life has taken quite an interesting series of twists and turns that I would have never imagined would have taken place in my life, but hey what can you expect? A good pastor friend of mine, used to always love to say, “Baby, what’s done in darkness will eventually come to the light.” I guess God has a funny way of shining his flashlight into my private chamber. Should I be angry or relieved that my secret is not so secret? How many times do we think the closest and most guarded secrets are really secrets, or are we the only ones that think it’s a secret and everyone around us is obliging us?

I am Caesar, taken from the legendary leader of the Roman Empire, whose life was one of turmoil. Just as I am in turmoil, yet I know that I can conquer. This blog is my outlet, it is my way of expressing my feelings of this journey that life has relentlessly strapped me into, and I’m wondering when will I reached my destination. I endeavor to pour my secrets, my joys, my pains, lessons that I’ve learned experiences and hopefully the eventual release of the real me. This is my journey to self-discovery, self-definition, and self-affirmation.

It's official...its the dawning of a new era, a new time in my life, a new time of self-expression in it's most purest and most honest form.

These are my chronicles, my history….read at your own risk.